Tuesday, February 10, 2009

cruising along....

I drove by myself today for the first time in weeks. I got in my car and felt sadness right away. It was the first time I've been alone in there in months. I started thinking about MJ and of every car ride I had with her, singing to her hoping that she would here mommy's voice. She would always start kicking or moving around. I have a feeling she loved music as much as her mommy and daddy do. I still remember that perfect night Joe placed his Ipod on my belly and she started moving around as soon as we started listening to classic rock (daddys favorite) We fell asleep happy as can be and it was one of the best nights of my life.

I felt some closure today as I drove with my windows down on this beautiful sunny day with the wind blowing in my hair. I felt her near me. I know my babygirl can still hear me where ever I go. I know she's listening! I love my daughter and always will. The best part of me was in her and will always be. I love you babygirl. As I move on with my life, I know she will always be apart of it. She can't ever not be. She was and continues to be my love, life, and happiness. I'm greatful I had the time I had with her even if it was cut drastically short. I know there was a reason for it even if right now I don't understand why. I just hope one day I'll know the answer to that question.

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