I've come to realize that there are people that will never know what to do or say to a grieving mother. I just sit back and smile as best I could to go through with it. No matter how insensitive they are. It's not their fault they don't know the pain it is to lose a child. I am very happy for them that they don't know what it feels like and I pray that they never find out.
I've come to realize some people will never think of Mila as a real person. That however, I will not tolerate. She was as real as you and me. She was my first child, my first daughter.
And once again, I am a mother of TWO.
I've come to realize that some think I wasn't careful in my pregnancy with Mila and that what happened was somehow my fault. I did everything perfectly right with Mila. I had a wonderful pregnancy. I was very lucky for that. However, I was ignored when I was having symptoms to what led to everything that happened. To those people who ignored me.... FUCK YOU!
I've come realize over and over again that family is the most important thing in my life. My family are those that are closest to me. Being the same blood doesn't consider you my family. My real family are those who know my pain, who were there for me and Joe through our darkest hour and who will always be there for us as we will always be there for them. I have true love and am greatful for every single one of them.
I've come to realize that my little family although not complete here on this earth, will always be complete in my heart. And for that I am thankful.
I've come to realize....
"when the night is cloudy, there is still a light, that shines on me, shine until tomorrow, let it be. I wake up to the sound of music, mother Mary comes to me, speaking words of wisdom, let it be."